The 18 Habits of Mentally Strong People

Amy Morin’s article for Inc.com, “The 18 Habits of Mentally Strong People,” really put a few things into perspective for me so I felt like sharing it.

As every human being has at some point, I have been struggling with my self-esteem and self-worth recently. I had gotten to a really wonderful place a few years ago where I actually felt totally confident and gorgeous inside and out (which is rare and I was very grateful during that time) but somehow that confident feeling slipped away. Between moving across the country, working at a job that really made me feel small, being a full-time grad student on top of  full time work (leaving no time to myself, let alone to form very many meaningful friendships), … I could go on and on. Basically every problem that normal people have on a daily basis I was having all at once. And then things got even worse, and I was constantly afraid of life. I was afraid to disappoint my job (that had treated me terribly) so I lied about the new job I had taken. I was afraid to disappoint my family, so I didn’t tell them some of the (not-mentioned-above) things that were going on in my life. Ditto for any close friends. I closed myself off and I am still very much closed off.

But obviously, I don’t like feeling like garbage. Not because it’s the “new year,” but just because this is when everything falls, I will be taking care of a lot of things that have been piling up in my life. The reason I shared this article is because during these hard times I have literally went to the internet to look for “self-esteem tips” and the like. I am not proud of these moments. I have been spending so much time being ashamed of myself. It feels like there are two of me, always. The rational side and the side that is always behaving erratically. I hate when the latter side wins. The rational side is saying, “You’re smart, you’re beautiful, you’re deserving, you’re kind,…” The erratic side says, “BUT! BUT ! BUT!”

Ms. Morin’s list is a list of “do’s” that at various times, I have done. Sometimes even all at once. But as I went down the list yesterday, my face fell. I don’t practice any of these and that’s really sad because with practice, these are all simple and can be done. So it’s not a resolution or anything like that, but I did write down these 18 tips in my journal and plan to go back to them at any time I need a reminder.

To see what’s going on in my journal (I do a lot of art journaling and post pages there…) or just to catch up with me and what I’m reading, my instagram (bookstagram)  is also maryjanereads. See you there I hope!

Advertisements

journaling/planning crisis

I just put into words for myself why I vacillate between paper and digital with planning and journaling etc. To break it down for you, I spent most of my school years (grades 6-senior year of undergrad) with a paper planner. I then had a year off from school, and once I started my first semester of grad school, I was into OneNote. But even as someone who uses ON, I don’t even use it to the best of its capabilities (I’ve seen some amazing spreads on tumblr!). I use a standard “notebook” and keep my to-do list in it, about a week or two at a time, and erase as I go. It mostly works for me but here are my issues:

  • I wish I could keep the old lists, but that involves moving it over into another page or notebook, and using up the space (I don’t pay to use this program so I have limited space). [Also this isn’t so important as my “lists” don’t always consist of anything important – just menial tasks for that day].
  • I tried to keep a paper planner where I would write down important things that got erased, but I fall off the wagon with this a lot.
  • When using only a paper planner, I dislike that I cannot easily “move things around.” My friend suggested using a pencil, but it doesn’t feel fancy enough, and I’ll never go back and rewrite with a pen if I want it to be more permanent.

 

These are very first-world issues and very specific issues to me. Usually by the time I write about a problem publicly, I have already went through every possible solution. This digital/paper problem bleeds into my journaling life too.

I like to journal, but the thoughts roll out fast. I type them so that I can get it all out, but then I wish it was written in my notebook. I often find myself transcribing into my notebook whatever I wrote in my computer document. This works well unless I have written a large amount of typed pages, or if i begin to self-edit as I copy into my journal.

My family got our first computer when I was six, in 1996, and my computer time was very limited until college. I was used to writing everything by hand be it a journal entry, a short story or poem, or homework (unless it was mandatory to be typed). I am a millenial and I love my technology. I don’t see anything wrong with it. I also adore planners, art and written journaling, bujos, the works. I don’t want to give up my love for either digital or paper but my time is not unlimited. I think we make time for things we love, and I definitely do make time for these things, but perhaps I could make more. Especially for the journaling and art journaling.

Tell me how or why you journal or plan the way you do.