journaling/planning crisis

I just put into words for myself why I vacillate between paper and digital with planning and journaling etc. To break it down for you, I spent most of my school years (grades 6-senior year of undergrad) with a paper planner. I then had a year off from school, and once I started my first semester of grad school, I was into OneNote. But even as someone who uses ON, I don’t even use it to the best of its capabilities (I’ve seen some amazing spreads on tumblr!). I use a standard “notebook” and keep my to-do list in it, about a week or two at a time, and erase as I go. It mostly works for me but here are my issues:

  • I wish I could keep the old lists, but that involves moving it over into another page or notebook, and using up the space (I don’t pay to use this program so I have limited space). [Also this isn’t so important as my “lists” don’t always consist of anything important – just menial tasks for that day].
  • I tried to keep a paper planner where I would write down important things that got erased, but I fall off the wagon with this a lot.
  • When using only a paper planner, I dislike that I cannot easily “move things around.” My friend suggested using a pencil, but it doesn’t feel fancy enough, and I’ll never go back and rewrite with a pen if I want it to be more permanent.

 

These are very first-world issues and very specific issues to me. Usually by the time I write about a problem publicly, I have already went through every possible solution. This digital/paper problem bleeds into my journaling life too.

I like to journal, but the thoughts roll out fast. I type them so that I can get it all out, but then I wish it was written in my notebook. I often find myself transcribing into my notebook whatever I wrote in my computer document. This works well unless I have written a large amount of typed pages, or if i begin to self-edit as I copy into my journal.

My family got our first computer when I was six, in 1996, and my computer time was very limited until college. I was used to writing everything by hand be it a journal entry, a short story or poem, or homework (unless it was mandatory to be typed). I am a millenial and I love my technology. I don’t see anything wrong with it. I also adore planners, art and written journaling, bujos, the works. I don’t want to give up my love for either digital or paper but my time is not unlimited. I think we make time for things we love, and I definitely do make time for these things, but perhaps I could make more. Especially for the journaling and art journaling.

Tell me how or why you journal or plan the way you do.

adventures in cooking

I have never been encouraged to cook by my family, only berated for not knowing how (and I was not going to ask to be taught by those who were verbally hurtful). While I know how to make pasta (but not sauce or meatballs), tacos, eggs, banana bread, and a few other extremely basic, “bland” foods, I am no Barefoot Contessa. My only claim to fame so far, homemade mac and cheese, has been slammed for being “cold in the middle,” no matter how long I heated it. I got an A+ from my brothers though! Anyway the bottom line is that I never felt confident enough to even try. There are those who will chalk it up to millenial damage, but I chalk it up to a whole other kind of damage.

But the week leading up to Easter, I had a special guest – my sister. Though she is 6 years younger than me, and acts her age in many ways, there are other ways in which she is vastly more mature. One of them being that she can actually cook. While she was here she taught me a basic italian sauce. I have some frozen, but will not be attempting to make my own until fall begins to beckon. But at least now I know how, and don’t need to buy a jar from the store unless I want to. I already know how to make chicken cutlets (it’s my favorite food!) so this fall I will make chicken parm. I plan on using the sauce my sister froze for lasagna next week!

During the weeks leading up to her visit, we talked about Easter Sunday and what we would cook. We decided on ham and potatoes as the main faire. When the day actually rolled around, she was not very helpful. But I wasn’t worried. She had already taught me so much about cooking in one week! I set a few timers on my phone to calm my anxiety, and got going. Dinner was a success!! I enjoyed making it!! All I needed was some confidence, a phone with the ability to set multiple alarms, and my sister, boyfriend, and good friend nearby for damage control.

Everyone loved dinner and I was so proud of myself. Two weeks later I promised to bring dessert to T’s house, the friend mentioned above. I normally would have panicked and bought some bakery cake from the local grocery. But I made (instant) pudding and poured it into a (premade) oreo crust. I got strawberries and some whipped cream. Now I know this is nothing. I whisked some milk and powder together and poured it into a premade crust. BUT… for me it was a HUGE STEP!

Lastly, tonight I made… *drumroll please* 2 STEAKS! All on my own! I used this recipe, and it worked out for me. I didn’t have anxiety, or freak out in any way. The steak was delicious and came out exactly like I imagined – no, wait, it was better 🙂 Along with the steak I made (instant) rice and (steamfresh) green beans. But when the green beans were done steaming, i mixed them in oil, salt, pepper, and garlic powder.
Tomorrow we are having guests for dinner, and I am making chicken and mashed potatoes. This is no shock because I have made this many times, even for the particular couple coming over. But on Friday I will attempt to make cod with a lemon sauce. I can’t wait.